Control your Brain,
Master your Game.
Life is just a Game ... but to Win you must Master it.
Three Conditions to Win Your Game
Participate: First, you must actively participate—life doesn’t happen to you; you create it. This means embracing challenges, taking risks, and fully engaging with the world around you.
Rules: There are distinct rules to how your brain functions. Whether you acknowledge it or not, they exist, and you are either in alignment with you brain, or in friction.
Your Game: You must learn the game you’re playing. Not your parent’s game, nor friends, spouses or colleagues, your personal game. Failure is not the enemy; it’s a necessary step in the learning how to play and win.
Remember, life is meant to be fun, and winning is about living a life of purpose, fulfillment, and happiness. LFG!
Winning the Game of Life
About Deano
Where it all started ...
I was told at an early age that I didn’t belong.
Not Directly … to the outside world I “passed” … I was an athlete, a good student, well liked and seemingly … straight.
Off handed jokes and tongue-in-cheek punchlines about “gays” made me terrified for my very survival.
This was a time in history where kids got beat up for acting gay and administrators would shrug their shoulders and say, you brought it upon yourself.
YEAH …
Internally there was a constant push and pull ...to be authentic, or to be accepted ... you couldn't be both.
So most nights, I would cry myself to sleep, praying to God for a miracle.
Searching for Validation
I pursued my undergrad and masters at Texas A&M, and thought, if I have a good job, people will have to like me.
After a quick stint in corporate real estate, I realized I wanted to make more of an impact and jumped into youth ministry and speaking. I thought, if I impact enough people, then people will have to like me.
But the more I spoke, the more people knew my name, the more terrified I became about my world. I knew one assumption could bring my career, finances, and social world to it's knees. In ministry you could be a alcoholic, drug addict ... even a sexaholic and the church would help you, but gay ... You're out!
So I left to be an actor in LA ... because if I was famous enough, then people would have to like me. But it's hard to be a good actor when you're constantly monitoring how people perceive you, not willing to tap into your emotions.
So I went into 100% commission insurance sales ... loved the product but not the cold calling.
So within a few years I founded my first startup based around solving the gift giving conundrum every parent and friend goes through ... because if I helped enough people, then people would have to like me.
But there was a bigger problem ...
The Moment that changed everything
On the night of August 8th, 2012, someone made an illegal u-turn in an SUV ... he never saw me.
In an instant, my body was shot over two lanes of oncoming traffic.
As I tucked and rolled, my head smashed into the curb, my helmet split, and my body flopped up onto a small berm, teetering above a 50 foot drop.
With my femur broken, my foot shattered, I screamed with excruciating and never ending pain, waiting for my body to go into shock …
It didn't.
I thought the pain would end when I got the right meds into my system, or when the multiple surgeries had healed, or after I learned to walk again.
The physical pain subsided, but the suffering persisted ...
The Choice
You see, I was used to working out daily, hiking with friends, playing volleyball every weekend, and being very social ... but all that came to an immediate stop.
I was in the hospital for the first week, followed by 6 months in a wheel chair, in a second floor walkup ... I felt isolated, trapped, vulnerable and so very alone.
Murakami said that pain is inevitable, but suffering is a choice.
As the physical pain began to subside, I found myself still wallowing in misery, internally struggling with all the usual questions ... Why me? What's my purpose? Do I matter?
And I gotta be honest, I did not like what I was hearing.
So I made the pivotal and difficult choice to ... change.
And over those 24 months, I researched, studied, and tried everything available to fix my issues.
And guess what I learned ... my issue was never my sexuality, my likability, or talent ... it was my self worth.
That realization opened the world up to me, I was finally becoming free.
My Purpose
Over the next decade, I continued to pursue the secrets to purpose, fulfillment and success through workshops, books, conferences, retreats and podcasts.
I also continued to work in start ups and create meaningful impact through social impact, all the while sharing my breakthroughs with friends and causing them to have breakthroughs.
In 2018, after returning from an 8 month stint taking care of my mom through her first lung cancer, contemplating my options for work, my friends told me, it's time.
And now years later I am so grateful to have impacted hundreds of CEO's and top execs through my coaching, thousands through my speaking, and tens of thousands with my written word.
And the beautiful thing ... my journey is just beginning.
Testimonials
Deano's approach to coaching has pushed me beyond my previous limits for personal growth and career achievement many times and helped focus me on healthy personal and business relationships.
Gary Pearl - Exec Producer - Jane the Virgin
Deano has always been a forward thinker when it comes to self care and helping people, brands and companies change their mindset! I did his workshop and it was life changing and created so much value in a very short amount of time!
Shannon Self - CEO - Talaria Marketing Agency
I knew there was another level and I couldn't seem to get there. But when I began working with Deano everything changed. I started booking more, my confidence went up. I acquired a heightened sense of awareness and opportunities appeared out of thin air. It clarified and reignited my passions.
Tilky Jones - Actor - Pretty Little Liars & Nashville
